A cautionary tale about cooking breakfast for your better half this long Waitangi weekend. This was so good, I almost fell off my kitchen stool laughing.
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.
‘Careful,’ he said, ‘CAREFUL! Put in some more butter!’
‘Oh my gosh! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!’
‘We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK!’
‘Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY?’
‘Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the freakin’ salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!’
The wife stared at him. ‘What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?’
The husband calmly replied, ‘I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.’
Happy Waitangi weekend!